Chapter 10 : To forgive, then move on.

~Forgive is a gift, to yourself.

A man comes to monk and asks, 'how do I be happy?' The monk points to a stone and asks the man to lift it.

The man lifts the stone. After 5 minutes, the man asks the monk, 'can I put down the stone?' Monk says not yet.
After 10 minutes, the man asks again and the monk still says no.
After 1 hour, the man feels the stone is very heavy and he feels very tired but the monk still refuses to let him put down the stone.
After 2 hours, just right before the man couldn't hold the stone anymore. The monk says, 'you may put down the stone now.'
Finally that man puts down the stone with relieve. So the monk asks him, 'do you feel happy?'
The man replies, 'yes, I am happy now.'

A lady came to the hospital and cries. She just swallowed 30 tablets of medicine in order to commit suicide. She just had another quarrel with her husband because her husband had an affair 2 years ago. She just couldn't let go. She feels it is so unfair for her. She was living in a miserable life for 2 years ever since the cheating. She had to see a psychiatrist for her depression and yet, she is still not happy. In fact, her husband had tried to make some amendment for her and he was never cheated on her again but she still refused to trust him and let go the issue. Because she feels if she let go and forgive her husband, then her husband will be free.

So what do these two stories implies? It is simple - to let go, then move on, you will find your own happiness.

That sounds so hard to certain people. Ya, that lady's husband might be a jerk and cheated on her. But why she had to live in a miserable life for 2 years. She did nothing wrong. Why should her punish herself instead of the husband? And definitely, suicide is a very stupid option to hurt your own body.

Sometimes we just have to let go. It is not for the other people who does something wrong. It is for our own self. It is for us to let go whatever happens in the past and to move on to our future. Because we deserve better life.

Remember, forgive is not for the person who had hurt you, it is for yourself. It is just because you let go, and you will see so many beautiful things in your life.

Key message : Learn to forgive yourself, spare yourself from the sin that other people did.